How many times do we say “I can’t…” in a day? A week? A year? How many opportunities, or chances do we miss by giving up before we even begin? There are a few reasons why one might think they can’t do something. And I’m going to discredit these reasons, effectively giving us no excuses. Are you ready for the truth?
Reason #3 why we say “I can’t”:
We’re scared. This is arguably the most common reason we tell ourselves that we can’t do something. Now, we don’t want to admit that we’re scared, because hey! We have our pride, right? If we don’t take chances, we’ll never fail. If we never fail, our egos are never bruised. If we keep things simple, we always look good. We decide to settle for careers that don’t challenge us. We convince ourselves that while we see a need, we aren’t the right “fit” to fill that need. We often leave the difficult tasks to others who are more “qualified” than we are. Why do we do this? Why do we let fear and pride hold us back? Easy. We do this because we are thinking about tackling these obstacles with only our strength and abilities.
As Christian women, we have access to the power of the creator. Read that again. Let that sink in. We have access to His power! We are all likely familiar with Philippians 4:13 “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength”. All things. Ladies, let me tell you something that I hope changes the way you look at your life. You have a talent, you have a passion, and it is not by accident. God has blessed every single one of us with talents in different areas because He wants to use us. And the passion! If you think you are not a passionate person, you need to dig deeper. God made us all passionate about something. If you ask God where and how He wants you to serve, He will show you. Once you find your place in serving, you will feel a passion rise inside of you that you didn’t know existed.
When we start undertaking our dreams, talents, passions, obstacles, ministries, motherhood, marriage using His power instead of ours, there is nothing that we can’t do.
Reason #2 why we say “I can’t”:
We may not have the support of our spouse and/or family members. This is such a difficult place to be. If you are in this position, it’s likely you’ve dreamed of something for a long time. You may have even begun the journey to reach your goals, achieve that dream, or serve God the way you feel led. But despite your efforts, you give up because it’s hurting your relationship. You finally say, “I can’t sacrifice my marriage for this.” And you’re right. If you actively seek your goals when your spouse doesn’t support them, either your goal or the relationship will fail.
But don’t give up! There is another option. If we take a moment to really examine the situation, we will see that this is a job for God, not us! We as human beings do not have the power to change hearts. But it just so happens that God specializes in that very thing.
I challenge you to change your focus. Pray for your spouse instead of praying for yourself and your dream/goal. Pray for your spouse to seek God and His plan. Have an honest and open conversation with your spouse about why you feel led to do whatever it is you want to do and then pray about it together. Finally, speak to your pastor and/or a Christian counselor. All of these actions will give God opportunities to work in your marriage/relationship in multiple ways. Trust me when I say if God wants this to happen, He will make a way.
Reason #1 why we say, “I can’t”:
We’re lazy. Ouch. The truth hurts, huh? We have grown complacent in our lives. We live happily in our comfort zone and the thought of all the work we’d have to do is not appealing. We justify these thoughts by telling ourselves “I’m too busy” or “I’m too old” or “Someone else will do it”. But if God is calling you to do something, no excuse will work. This happens to be something I have personal experience in…
I sang on the worship team for nine years at a church. Singing is a true passion of mine, and singing for God – there really are no words to describe how fulfilling it is. However, due to unfortunate circumstances, we left that church feeling hurt and betrayed. I wallowed in self-pity for two years by choosing to sleep in on Sundays. I didn’t make any effort to further my relationship with God, and I didn’t serve.
My best friend belongs to a local church and she invited me to go every time we talked. Every. Time. It was so annoying! LOL. She even tried to bribe me with chocolate! (I didn’t mind that so much.) God had been telling me to go. But, alas, I am a stubborn daughter. I came up with excuse after excuse, continued to tell God and my bestie “no” over and over. But my time to say “no” ran out.
At a local skating rink for my bestie’s son’s birthday party, she introduced me to someone. She said, “Kristy, this is Pastor Brett. Brett, Kristy wants to sing on the worship team.” Then she turned around and walked away while I stood there gaping like a fish out of water. I auditioned for the worship team the following week, and joined the church immediately after. If you ask my friend, she’d tell you that God called her to get me to church. You see, God wasn’t only telling me to go, He was working on the people in my life too. He set the stage, opened the door, and almost literally pushed me through it.
We can come up with hundreds of reasons why we “can’t” do what God is calling us to do. We’re wives, mothers, single mothers, employees, employers, homemakers, homeschoolers, dance/football/baseball/basketball/soccer/wrestling moms, PTA volunteers, caretakers of our parents, sounding boards for siblings, Aunts, Grandmothers, friends, the glue that holds our families together. But without God, we are nothing.
He made us for a purpose. He made you exactly the way He wanted you. He wove your talent into you. He placed your dreams and passion in your soul. I’m here to tell you that you can’t ignore it. If you don’t do what you were put on this earth to do, you will forever feel incomplete and unsatisfied. Every single reason you “can’t”, every excuse can be reversed and fixed by God. Seek His will in your life and you will live a life full of purpose and passion. Trust me, YOU CAN!
Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Ephesians 3:20 (NLT)
…for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose. Philippians 2:13 (NIV)
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 (NIV)
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